Adrian Dater Really Isn’t Using His “A” Material For VERSUS.com

 

VERSUS.com Columnist Adrian Dater

As the blurb underneath his tiny photo points out, that man above is Denver Post/VERSUS.com columnist Adrian Dater.  We like Adrian.  He’s kind of nuts.  He once posted this in response to a media-member saying that by not appearing on ESPN every day, he wasn’t “being all that he could be”:

And here’s my answer to my still respected friend, that I should have said right away: hell yes, I’m glad I’m not some ESPN stooge, who might make more money than me, but spends his/her entire day preening around the athletic arena, microphone in hand, makeup case in hand, hair spray in hand, ready to ask an inane, suckup, kiss-butt question to a player that, at the end of the day, at the end of this life, at the end of this universe, HAS ABSOLUTELY NO RESONATING IMPACT ON THE MEMORIES OF ITS VIEWING AUDIENCE, AND ABSOLUTELY NO LASTING IMPACT ON ANYTHING REMOTELY ASSOCIATED WITH THE ART CALLED “JOURNALISM” WHICH YOU FALSELY ATTACH YOURSELVES TO.” 

Isn’t that wacky?  It kind of reminds us of Ben Affleck’s Keith Olbermann impression on SNL.  Anyway, Dater was told to take it down and did soon after, but gracias to the blogosphere for keeping it alive, and the Latest Word for us finding it from that particular website, where you can finish your big ol’ cup o’ crazy for the day.

Anyway, Mr. Dater has been writing for VERSUS.com since the beginning of the season.  Initially, we were excited when he and fellow hockey columnists Mike Heika and Chuck Gormley were providing actual original content to the poorly designed website of the NHL’s cable television home.  But, well, some of their stuff, especially Mr. Dater’s, lately has been, how should we say… crap?

First of all, there’s this piece from last week with some lame jokes about how to market Crosby & Ovechkin:

FIRST SPOT: CANADIAN-RUSSIAN IDOL
Fade in: Ovechkin is Jagger, circa 1970s, sneering at society and tempting Kennedys with a devil in song. Crosby is the Canadian Idol, singing versions of Beatles tunes “I Wanna-Hold-Your-Hand” and maybe a little “P.S., I Love You.” 

Simon Cowell seems to have developed a man crush watching Crosby sing. “That was absol-ewetly brilliant,” he gushes.

But the crowd seems to prefer the bad-boy Ovie/Jagger. When Ovie does “Hair of the Dog” by Nazareth in his next number, he brings the house down. Crosby looks on in cherubic contempt.

Oh, and more hilarity ensues!  By “hilarity”, I mean “peptic ulcers”.

But what really grinds our gears is this post from prior to the New Jersey-St. Louis game last Tuesday.  Dater’s job is to preview the occasional VERSUS game along with crack references to cutting-edge bands like Nazareth.  Did he talk about the Devils newfound “let’s score goals for once” style of play?  How about the injuries plaguing the Blues?  What about a few cheap John Davidson-Matt Millen jokes?  That seems right up Adrian’s alley.  

No, Dater decides to re-write history and create a seething rivalry between two organizations over something that happened 15 years, and two ownership changes (for each team) ago:

The St. Louis Blues versus the New Jersey Devils, Tuesday night on Versus, is a showdown between two teams that loathe each other.

Hyperbole? Not at all.

These organ-i-zations detest one another, all because of one man: Scott Stevens.

Stevens has been retired for three years now, but the bitter legacy of his departure from St. Louis to New Jersey in 1991 – and near return in 1994 that led to a tampering conviction against the Blues five years later – lives on.

Oh yeah, we totally feel the loathe from all those Blues fans nowadays, Adrian.  Their hatred of us has made this once-a-year matchup one of those days where we park our backsides on the couch sticking needles into voodoo dolls of Al MacInnis and drawing funny glasses over Manny Legace’s pictures to make him look foolish.

Look, sir, you are cleary one of the few beat writers who is able to show his passion for the sport while remaining unbiased.  Sort of.  All we ask is that you bring a little more of that passion to your side gig, cause frankly, your past shots at VERSUS’ main competitors have us reading anyway.

I’m sure they don’t care if you unleash another screed of hate toward ESPN.  In fact, I think they’d like you to show them the opposite of your ‘V’.